Vernalisation & Springing Forward
What happens beneath the surface when we take the time to reflect & work on ourselves?
In 2023, I started to realise that I needed to pause, to reflect on my work to date, the habits I had created in my life and make some conscious choices about my next phase.
I realised I've been working for over 30 years, and I've been a coach for over 20 and a business owner for more than 15. I've accumulated knowledge and experience, but I've rarely taken step back and reflected on what I've learnt, and how I can apply that in my work and in my life.
I started to use words like “sabbatical” to justify the building feeling that I needed some space to rest and time to reflect. I loved my work, but physically and mentally I was tired and knew I needed to make some changes to the habits that had seen me teetering on the edge of burnout more than once!
Sabbatical felt like a good professional word – people would respect that decision and understand it!
In October 2023 I attended a coaches’ retreat, where I had a chance to breathe, to reflect and think.
– Wow did I need to take a taste of my own medicine and that medicine was based right here in the Somerset countryside –
I've always felt a deep connection with the autumn and winter, much less so to spring and summer. In fact, those traditionally joyous seasons were often times of dread for me - deep in my memory sat exams, new school years, and a pressure to be seen to make the most and have a good time. I love the peace that the darker months bring - the chance to stop awhile. My sabbatical timing was spot-on for me, and I came away from that retreat with several goals:
1. Learn to meditate (to give myself a solid foundation)
2. Start to journal (to enable me to reflect on and make decisions in my life and work)
3. Reflect on the things I needed to harvest from my work so far & the things I needed to change or let go
I also learnt a new word, the word that would firmly replace sabbatical in my vocabulary:
– It was time to VERNALISE, to allow my sap to sink, to nourish my roots and enable me to grow again –
I’ve talked about my battles with my mental health in the past and I’ve worked hard to understand and manage this, ensuring that I’ve remained open and available for my clients. As a coach it is critical to manage your emotions, avoiding transference to the client. This takes conscious work and a discipline of self-care.
It was time for me to focus on that self-care for a while and the idea of a period of vernalisation took hold, especially alongside nature’s own journey. For me the timing was perfect. Autumn 2023 was spent clearing, sorting and winding down - completing projects and client programs, and then starting to do the work on myself.
In December, I spent a week at the London Meditation School, doing a course in an automatic, self-transcending technique of meditation called Vedic Meditation This has become a twice daily, core part of my life and is now a fundamental foundation to my wellbeing, a habit I plan to continue for the rest of my life. At the same time, I started a daily journal, reflecting on my emotions, thinking patterns and the life I wanted to create. I continued to close every evening with a gratitude journal, writing down the ten things I am grateful for in my life – I am so grateful for the positive focus this gives me as I go to sleep each night. Soon the weekly heartbeat of my vernalisation period took hold, focused very much on my mental and physical well-being.
It’s important for me to say here that I haven’t undertaken this journey alone. I have sought the support from a trusted therapist, to help me analyse and work through some of the more difficult things that have emerged – often facing up to my own shadows and where I need to develop. I also have a great coach supervisor, who enables me to apply my insights and ideas to my work as a coach, whilst also holding me to account in my coaching practice. It was also interesting to test out my thinking and ideas on my long-suffering husband and family!
The big, bold, professional intention of writing a book hasn’t happened yet; vernalisation has meant that I moved inwards, and the focus became one of rest and reflection. I had no idea that it would feel this profound, and that shifts that would start to happen in relationships and the way I was living.
How does this relate to my work as a coach & consultant?
All of my work is about behaviour change. In my coaching practice the focus is often on how we think and our emotion, recognising how this impacts our choices about behaviours and how we can create more fulfilling work and personal lives. For the people I work with this is about building really effective leadership skills, more fulfilled lives, and organisational cultures where people thrive. This work is always so much deeper than the rational, intellectual level. It goes to the heart of how people feel.
– Being a coach and consultant is a privileged role, one that I find hugely rewarding and fulfilling. It also takes work to ensure that I equip myself to be the most authentic, resilient and available coach for my clients –
This has been a time of learning and growth for me, one that I am grateful to have been able to take. I am returning to work with greater clarity about the work that I love, the value I can add, and the continuing self-development to keep me honest in my work. I have been holding a mirror up to myself and asking myself many of the questions that I pose to clients. I am excited about the next phase of my work, a phase where authenticity and trust will remain at the heart of what I do.
What practices do you include in your life to ensure you are developing your own resilience?
Who supports you along this journey?
If you are interested in how coaching could help you to create the life and leadership role you desire, please get in touch for a free discovery call.