More excuses than results? Could an Accountability Partner be the answer?
We are six weeks into 2019 and thinking about New Year’s resolutions may feel a long time ago. Whether you made bold declarations to change your behaviour, or wrote a detailed plan for 2019 and beyond – how does progress look six weeks on?
Which ever way we choose to approach our goal setting, we set out with the best of intentions for the year ahead. In my blog “Creating a new path – one without holes in the road”, I wrote about setting goals that will make a real, sustainable difference to your life, but this plan doesn’t magically fall into place once the goals are on the paper. However we set our vision for the future, however detailed our plans for the year ahead, in many ways that’s the easy bit done!
– How do we take responsibility for making our plans a reality and stay accountable for achieving our dreams? –
In a recent YouTube video https://youtu.be/USsqkd-E9ag actor Will Smith explained his perspective on personal responsibility. In his matter of fact explanation, he is really clear that the responsibility for achieving whatever we set out to in our lives is ours alone..
Many of my clients come to coaching and explain that, despite the fact that they are very clear about the direction in which they are heading, and they are taking responsibility for the journey, they often revert back to their old norms after only a few weeks. They often put this down to the overwhelm of day to day work and life responsibilities. The things they really want to achieve slip further down their action list as each week passes.
– Changing our behaviour to achieve our goals and dreams can be tough when we feel we are alone in our endeavours –
When I have a client who is experiencing difficulties sticking to their plans, I often suggest that they consider working with an Accountability Partner. This is even more useful once the coaching relationship ends. Having a colleague, friend or a networking peer to support you can be a fulfilling experience, for both of you.
“I’ve so many plates spinning, the last thing I need is another person to meet with!” If you feel like this and think you don’t have time to carve out 30 minutes a week, consider the following questions:
· What is your busyness stopping you from creating in your life right now? How does that feel?
· What will happen if you do start to achieve the goals you dreamt of?
· What will happen if things don’t change? What might you miss out on?
The answers to these questions will highlight how important your goals really are, and if they are worth investing 30 minutes of your week to make them real.
I’ve had an Accountability Partner for the last six months and it’s the most effective 30 minutes of my week! The model was introduced to me by business coach, Nick Cramp (https://www.nickcramp.com/ ) and we set up the relationship to support the development of our own businesses. We have similar roles, but very different client bases; our lives and personalities are very different, but our values are very similar and that enables an effective relationship. We work together from a place of respect – holding each other to account for taking the actions we’ve planned – your Accountability Partner can’t be the person who colludes with your excuses! We also provide the space to openly share successes as well as challenges.
So how does it work?
We spend 30 minutes a week, the start of the week works well for us, on the phone or Zoom. We take 15 minutes each to work through 5 questions:
1. What was your biggest success from last week?
2. What did you learn last week?
3. Three specific objectives you are going to achieve this week
4. Three people you are going to reach out to this week
5. What are you looking forward to most this week and why?
Whilst one of us talks the other listens, asks questions to clarify and challenges when the excuses start to emerge. We also acknowledge and celebrate each other’s successes.
Having this structure has given me a real focus on my goals, short and long term. There is nothing quite like explaining out loud why you have been too busy to do anything to focus the mind! I am the type of person who loves flexibility and can start to feel pinned down when too many detailed plans are in place. However, this tendency doesn’t focus me on achieving my dreams, I need to be accountable beyond my natural chaos. My Accountability partner keeps me real, creating enough boundaries to ensure that I fly in the right direction.
If you would like to know more about how you could benefit from working with, or finding the right Accountability Partner, or you would like to talk about how a coaching programme could help you to map out your plans and dreams, please get in touch.